Why did God make mothers?• “She’s the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.”
• “Mostly to clean the house.”
• “To help us get out when we were being born.”
How did God make mothers?• “He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.”
• “Magic, superpowers, and a lot of stirring.”
• “God made my mom like me… just using bigger parts.”
What ingredients are mothers made of?• “Clouds, angel hair, everything nice in the world, and one dab of mean.”
• “They started from men’s bones… then mostly string, I think.”
Why did God give you your mom instead of another mom?• “Because we’re related.”
• “God knew she likes me more than other people’s moms like me.”
What kind of little girl was your mom?• “My mom has always been my mom.”
• “Probably pretty bossy.”
• “They say she used to be nice.” 
What did your mom need to know about your dad before marrying him?• “His last name.”
• “If he was a crook or gets drunk on beer.”
• “If he said NO to drugs and YES to chores.”
Why did your mom marry your dad?• “My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world.”
• “She got too old to do anything else with him.”
• “Grandma says she didn’t have her thinking cap on.” 
Who’s the boss at your house?• “Mom, because dad’s such a goofball.”
• “Mom. She sees the stuff under the bed.”
• “Mom has more to do than dad.”
What’s the difference between moms and dads?• “Moms work at work and at home. Dads just work at work.”
• “Moms can talk to teachers without scaring them.”
• “Dads are stronger, but moms have the real power.”
• “Moms have magic. They make you feel better without medicine.”
What does your mom do in her spare time?• “Mothers don’t do spare time.”
• “Pay bills all day long.”
What would make your mom perfect?
What would make your mom perfect?• “Inside she’s already perfect.”
• “Maybe a diet… and blue hair.”
If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?• “I’d get rid of her thing about cleaning my room.”
• “I’d make her smarter so she’d know my sister did it.”
• “I’d remove the invisible eyes on the back of her head.” 
Kids really do say the sweetest and funniest things. 
